One Thing I Have Learned About Life

“If there is one thing I have learned about life, it is that it goes on.”

~Robert Frost

This is one of my favorite quotes. Now a days life is dramatic! No longer does failing a test mean that you will have to study harder next time. Now it means that you will have horrible grades, not get into college and live in your parent's basement the rest of your life! Things are blown out of proportion all the time! I am no stranger to this kind of dramatization. I am very sarcastic, dramatic, and I exaggerate everything! [See that!? That was an exaggeration! =P]

As I was saying, life is hard. People from a young age are expected to have the rest of their lives mapped out, and I think I get caught up in the moment sometimes, and I think a little to far ahead of myself. Goals are a good thing, but goals that are to high? Well just make sure that you know that they are high and may be unattainable. Sometimes the best things in life are the simple joys. Things like bubbles, children laughing, old couples holding hands in a park, warm summer rains that come right when you are feeling down, and nature.

Now I don't know how many of you know this, but I love nature. To me nature is spiritual. I believe that deity lives on earth through nature. I believe that in every aspect of nature there is rebirth, growth, challenge, and symbolism. I recall spending a month watching a tulip grow out of the ground. No I was not sitting there staring at it for a month, but when I walked in and out of my house I would look at it. I watched it grow out of the ground, slowly. Then the petals filled with life. They slowly began to open and the snow came. They closed up again. Then it melted and those petals opened, but slower this time. It was as if the little flower was watching it's back, so it wouldn’t get hurt again. Several times I watched as the flower opened and closed it's petals until finally those petals opened through wind, rain, snow, and sunshine. That flower grew til it was strong. Oh listen to me! I am going off on my tulip adventures! But basically what I am trying to say is that nature is wonderful to me!

This past week I had something occur to me. This was not a new phenomena. I had been there several times. Every time I felt helpless, weak, small, and like I would never find light again. I had grown so dependent on someone else that when they left, my world caved in. But I am okay. Just like Mr. Frost said, life goes on. My world hasn't caved in. As Regina Spektor has said in her song Rejazz

“the clock still strikes midnight and noon
And the sun still rises and so does the moon
Birds still migrate south and people move on
Even though I'm no longer in your arms
Thought the mountain would crumble
And the rivers would bend
But I thought all wrong and the world did not end”

I have friends. I have talents. I have potential. I have me. I have my Goddess and my God. I have love. I have music. I have a life all my own. And it will continue, it will be harder for a while, and it will hurt at times. But it will go on. I still hope that things will go back. I still hope that things will work out and get better. I know they might not, and although it hurts like Hell, I am okay. I know that I will live my life and things will get better.

Now for just one more quote. This one comes from my amazing friend Katrina. When all of this was happening I was crying to her and Kylie for comfort. I said to her “what guy would want to be with me after all that I have done?” and Katrina just looked at me and said “The right one.” I just thought that was pretty cool! I have wonderful friends! I am so lucky! I have truly been blessed in my life with amazing people who ALWAYS have my back! Thank you to Katrina and Kylie! Thanks to my “Personal Mafia” (you know who you are), and thanks to the Torres Family who has helped me remember to smile! Thanks to all who have helped me through this time!