Oh no big deal... just getting married and stuff...

So I am getting married to the most amazing man in the entire world! I have had a lot of people ask me a million questions about him and our relationship so I figures I'd just do a little post answering the most common questions I get about us.

We met  online, talked through email for a couple days, then text and then we finally decided to meet about a week or so after we started talking. It was an instant connection. He made me laugh harder than I had in a long time and I loved it. We just went on a walk through 2 parks and we went out to eat burgers and we talked about our friends and family and lifestyle and childhood and it was amazing. At the end of the date I knew I had to see him again. There was chemistry oozing out of us I swear.

Matt is amazing, but when we are together it's even better. I love just being super lazy with him and eating pizza and ice cream and watching movies together. Matt has an incredible sense of humor and he's insanely smart and driven. The best part about Matt is that he loves me, and he sees me as more than enough for him. But because I see Matt the same way I strive to be a better person for him to. He feels like enough but he makes me want to be better. I love that.

So the proposal was pretty much awesome. I knew he had the ring, I had seen the ring, it was sitting on his kitchen counter. I actually picked it out. I was trying to convince him to just hand it to me, we were already planning the wedding, we'd told family and friends and I just wanted my ring already! So  it was like 1 in the morning and I was about to leave his apartment and we were kind of bantering about it. He kept saying he wanted to surprise me. I went to put on my coat and when I turned around he was on one knee, and it was amazing. I don't think it mattered that it was at 1 am in his kitchen instead of in a restaurant or park or some other classier setting. In that moment I saw the man I love on one knee asking me to marry him. It was perfect <3

Final Words <3 I love Matt haha.... lame I know but this post was purely silly and fun and not profound enough for a thought provoking statement or question... haha 

Even in Utah

Some of you may already know this, some may not. I have recently gone back to the LDS church. To anyone that knows me at all, it would be obvious that this was not a hasty decision. Religion has always been important to me. One of my friends pointed out that it really did take a miracle to bring me back, but I don't regret anything. I always had a close relationship with God and through all of my studies and church hopping and prayers I believe God put me where I needed to be to grow and learn the way I needed to. I don't regret my allegiance in the Nature-Based Wiccan faith, and I can honestly say that I still hold onto some of the principals of that faith and I miss a lot about it. But God told me that it was time for me to be a Mormon and that that was where he wanted me to be. And so I am.

But that isn't what this post is about. I expected going back to be difficult for one reason and one reason only, because I found strength in the fact that I had worked so hard to find something that made me happy even though I had little support from my peers. I felt like a piece of that strength was dying. Like I was "giving into peer pressure". I had to consistently remind myself of the feelings I had and the revelation I received and that this wasn't me just giving up. But I was certain that my friends and family would welcome me with open arms and hearts.

I was wrong. I mean the first thing happened, my family was ecstatic, but my friends? Not so much. I mean I had a few friends that are more than supportive, but I guess a lot of them lost their respect for me. I am no longer "against the grain". To them I am "just like everyone else". It kills me a little bit. I have had adults (usually non members) who respected me a lot because I left a church that didn't make me happy, and defied my family and my peers to find what I believe in. That didn't change. I still did that. I still grew a lot and changed a lot from my journey with God that is truly never ending. I will never judge someone because they don't share my beliefs, and I know God can tell someone to be a member of another faith because it is what they need to grow and learn. I am still me. But it would be wrong for me to deny what Christ told me.

I never thought in a million years that even in Provo, Utah, would I loose respect for being a Mormon. But that has happened, and it's sad. Many of these people are close friends that aren't members themselves. When I wasn't a member I found a lot of solace and kinship cultivated with other nonmembers that had felt the pressure to be a part of the herd. We found strength to be different in each other. We often swapped stories about being mistreated or judged for our religious differences. But now those people have turned their backs on me and are judging me for my differences with them. I will not judge you guys, but just think about what you are doing.

With that being said I feel it's important to learn about and find the light in all religions. I have never, nor will I ever judge someone for the way they see Deity. Ever. Mormonism is the majority here, but apparently humans have a way of making a majority feel like a minority. I think you can find a huge lesson in that. Everyone is a minority in a million ways. People are judgmental creatures. We have to be. We have to judge who our friends are, who to trust, who to be in relationships with, it's a part of being human. The most important thing though is to remember that just because someone makes different choices than you, and they have a lifestyle that you aren't comfortable with or that you disagree with doesn't make them less than you. D&C 18:10 "Remember the worth of souls is great in the sight of God" it doesn't say chaste souls, wealthy souls, intelligent souls, charitable souls, or Mormon souls. It says souls. All souls. Yours, mine, theirs, every soul of all nationalities, political parties, religions and struggles. All of us.

Final Words <3 You are a majority, you are a minority and your soul is great in the sight of God.