Three Major Problems with Relationships and Dating

I hate dating. I have been in a relationship for the last few years, and I haven’t really been in the game at all through high school but now I am, and I hate dating. There are three major problems with relationships in my opinion. All of which I overcome because as you all know I am perfect ;] haha. So I am going to talk about the three things anyone and everyone in or looking for a relationship should think about.

#1 – The Most Important Kind of Love

Everyone is looking for their other half, or their missing piece. But the most important kind of love a person can have is self respect. Love you. But in order to love you, you have to get to know yourself a little bit. One of my favorite examples of this is the movie Runaway Bride. Julia Roberts stars in this movie as Maggie, the girl who has run away at the altar FIVE times! Why? Richard Greer (her charming costar) interviews the ex-grooms to find out. It’s because she didn’t know her. She conformed to the person she loved. And she did love these men, she just didn’t love herself. And how could she? She didn’t know herself so that she could love herself. Take that time, find you, love you, be you, and commit.

#2 – Alone Time

I am a needy person. I’ll be the first to admit that I like spending all of my time with the person I care for. But my sister once said a very wise thing (as she often does). She said “In a healthy relationship there needs to be a you, a me, and an us together.” That is SO true. Let him have guy time, and friend’s time. Make sure YOU have you time and girl time as well. If you don’t you’ll lose you in the togetherness and you will feel trapped. And then if anything goes south and your relationship is over, people who kept themselves will not feel as inclined or desperate to go find a new man to be together with again. They will be content with just themselves.

#3 – Work

Relationships are work. That’s all there is to it. Sometimes a VERY lucky person meets someone who they never argue with and they get along with %97 of the time, but that hardly ever happens. Don’t be bent on being one of the few who hardly ever have to work. Good relationships are based on trust, communication, compromise, and all of those things take WORK! If things aren’t easy don’t quit! Work on it! Fight for it! Otherwise you will never find “the one”. (in my opinion there is no the one anyways. Any two people who love each other and have the same values and goals in life can be together IF they are willing to work of coarse :] )

<3 Final Words: Make sure that you love, work for, and find yourself always :] 

Love is a Four Way Street

It's no secret that I love musicals, and Rent is one of my favorites. This musical has a lot of great messages and music, but today I am going to focus on Roger and Mimi's story. Roger has had a lot of heart ache and break in his life, and is no longer open to love or to who he is. Mimi is a sexy, fun, outgoing girl who lives life on the edge from minute to minute. There comes a point where Mimi is hurt that Roger wont be with her, they care for each other and she gave their relationship her all and he just didn't seem to care. He says to her "You're words are nice Mimi but love is not a three way street, You'll never share real love until you learn to love yourself, I should know." I love that line. Love is often thought of as a two way street, you love me I love you. In Roger and Mimi's case love was a three way street, she loved him, her loved her, and she loved herself. True love IS a four way street. I love me, you love you, you love me, I love you. That's how it needs to be.

Nowadays people are to focused on relationships. When a young girl gets into high school one of her main goals is to date a senior, or to find a guy to hold hands down the hall with. Everyone spends so much time trying to find another person that they don't find themselves. Music is an obvious inspiration in my life. But in this case I am disappointed. All of the songs on the radio talk about finding your 'soul mate', your 'other half', saying that someone has 'a little piece of you', or that your 'life would incomplete' or 'over' without this other person. It's just stupid. Why don't we teach young people to find themselves, their values, their standards, their interests, and what they are and aren't good at and passionate about. Then when they are pleased with themselves they can find another person who is pleased with them self and they can be together. People will always change, that's natural. People change, they grow, but you have to have a core before you can grow with someone else in a healthy relationship. Haven't you seen Runaway Bride? (I love Julia Roberts!!!) 

Final Words <3 Who are you?

Here's the Clip from Rent as this group of friends falls apart after the death of Angel, one of the brightest and most inspiring of them all. I watched this four times and I seriously cried. I am watching Rent tonight.